I'm sitting here on my couch.
Leg propped up, pain medication and heating pad administered.
What the fuck?
My life, as I knew it, was just starting to get back on track.
Things were finally returning to some sense of "normality".
...and then this.
Is it a new injury?
Or is it from the Arthroscopic knee surgery I had in Germany back in 1996?
X-rays were taken.
I doubt...EXTREMELY...that they will show anything.
I've been through this before.
Soft tissue damage.
It doesn't show up on an X-ray.
I know that.
Basically, probably, hopefully not, but more than likely I'm fucked.
And there is absolutely NOTHING that I can do about it.
I've been here before.
Unfortunately.
I can barely walk.
I can barely stand.
It might as well be a 10 mile hike just to get to the bathroom.
This is nothing new to me.
Like I said, I've been here before.
Halfway across the world...but I've been here before.
But does this mean, once this passes, that I will, more than likely, spend the rest of my life hobbling about like some old, feeble, handicapped person?
Something is telling me yes.
Me.
I used to dance.
REALLY dance.
Ballet.
Jazz.
Tap.
Modern.
I can't even get to the kitchen to make myself a sandwich.
Fuck you world.
Fuck you.
No.
I
FUCKING
MEAN
IT.
FOOUH
UHHK
EYOO
OOUU!!!
After everything I've been through in the past year, YOU THROW THIS MOTHER FUCKING SHIT IN MY FACE???
"From Hells heart, I stab at thee."
"For hates' sake, I spit my last breath at thee."
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1 comment:
I hope you feel better SOON!!
~Melissa
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