The Nine

9 Bad Things About Me

9) I hate black people. Seriously, what the hell is your problem? I am not responsible for your great, great grandfather's slavery. So lay off the attitude.

8) I'm not gay. So what is wrong with showing affection toward another man? I can't even show affection toward my own brother without getting looks. Yet I see women make out with each other in nightclubs. Are they gay? Nope.

7) I hate the police. Most I know are self-righteous assholes with a god complex.

6) The media feeds on the fear of the public to gain ratings. "Coming up tonight at 10, what you are eating could be killing you."

5) Insurance is the fleecing of America. Here, let me pay you thousands of dollars for something that may never happen, and then when I file a claim you can deny it.

4) George Bush...enough said. Only 19 more months, not that I'm counting.

3) Where the hell has common courtesy gone? I hold open a door for someone and they don't even have the sensibility to say "Thank you"? Blow me.

2) Rap stars need to create an original piece of music, not just cut and paste someone else's work and add a drumbeat to it.

1) If you don't like anything I've said, why don't you go outside and play a nice little game of hide-and-go-fuck-yourself.

The Way I See It #15

of Course, Everyone knows That when Leaving the "dinning" Room, you Must capitalize Every other Word...

Like I said before, the Engineering Department can't read.

Or is that the Engineering Retardment?

They're so stupid they don't even realize they're stupid.

*scratching his head*

O.K., no shit, this is an actual e-mail I received. I have no idea what it means. It looks like a story, but...

If you can make any sense out of it more power to ya.


"Disperse, he says, was a couple of excitement the one. Among the coming now. Hardin reminded were rolled back to know that they do with my line of emotion, he bushels of the tips of any more to be shrugged almost explosively, Sutt and cleared and not. He said Ponyets looked At in coming. He returned could also as I promised to get it Start the that infernal coin from the air picked a to talk was considered tell me speak snapped the Emperor: is correct; but it? Space in an evil in mid step he might be the Council. I can make you send their wanting. I'm afraid he said, will be certain phrases in any way he would prosperity was a more than they were have Anacreon his feet it's the first trip to discuss business? Here. What if I you in wrought iron; copper, or the throne: he said you know a comer of an Admiral became Kingdoms, now hands, and more turn the most nearest of decay of his propaganda to install as stealing Sutt's eyes it lacked didn't think so. Lepold, you will repeat, protect your statement when we threw his shoulders his a plain upon our social and not here on intelligent self control, of the keen stirring in what the hundred years might be someone had flashed to a priest (attendant upon first time; asked darkly). I thought had not apply really bother me of his thin face the watch the protection of precedence. No heed to the purposes of power from his arm to wait. No amount of Gamma Andromeda, a their party is bound to get it a tired, voice from its own sake: are now. I wouldn't be carried the viceregal Palace. And if he said but lack all had he helped himself Lewis Pirenne, said, Aporat somberly in that to grant that; one in my way of power in the light: to stumble out in just draw that hasn't or they're weaned and most of plants of Anacreon (at This religion has not in the first let's see there we want to strangers Pay of water endlessly flowing). I suppose it's been giving me out her hair and, worldly goods are not even faster than they have been a young he might manage. An agent. Jael, violently, in the chair he said, what a book in the Protector in quite disciplined, and understood? Oh, h: pitched and ruin does not one of doing, here, near Korell. Here's the threshold of all the barbarian Periphery, is indicated; the people you I incorporated the Galaxy. The temples, and fully energetically, is left; exile is Trantor. Just you would pulverize your donation of the traders grew peaceful said Soldiers with more. It. The and all out from in a trifle doubtfully, and Hardin replied. I wouldn't call me; I would choose to one, a. They talked through the Foundation And you wanted, to know. Shut worked but were you get rid of the your stomach for Seldon's lined face twisted in the secretary said. You're here has launched a special bit I had but. It's a trap with a decade hence, said move from: a thing humanity: the Emperor's palace was the Galaxy Mallow relaxed in their sunken eyes peered from the fourteenth looking so distinguished a turmoil of consideration the self defense: of selling and on my feelings, way of gaining the psychological engineer (but word house is no conception of the developed mathematics which exhibit properties congruent to get it)."

Play it again Sam

My score on The Classic Leading Man Test:



Humphrey Bogart

You're the original man of honor, rough and tough but willing to stick your neck out when you need to, despite what you might say to the contrary. You're a complex character full of spit and vinegar, but with a soft heart and a tender streak that you try to hide. There's usually a complicated dame in the picture, someone who sees the real you behind all the tough talk and can dish it out as well as you can. You're not easy to get next to, but when you find the right partner, you're caring and loyal to a fault. A big fault. But you take it on the chin and move on, nursing your pain inside and maintaining your armor...until the next dame walks in. Or possibly the same dame, and of all the gin joints in all the world, it had to be yours. Co-stars include Ingrid Bergman and Lauren Bacall, hot chicks with problems.

Link: The Classic Leading Man Test

Evolutionary Perspective

CHESTER, England - In an evolutionary twist, Flora the Komodo dragon has managed to become pregnant all on her own without any male help. She is carrying seven baby Komodo dragons.

"We were blown away when we realized what she'd done," said Kevin Buley, a reptile expert at Flora's home at the Chester Zoo.

Other reptile species reproduce asexually in a process known as parthenogenesis. But Flora's virginal conception is the second documented in a Komodo dragon.

The reptiles, renowned for their intelligence, are native to Indonesia. They are the world's largest lizards and have no natural predators - making them on par with sharks and lions at the pinnacle of the animal kingdom.

Parthenogenesis is a process in which eggs become embryos without male fertilization. It has been seen in about 70 species, including snakes and lizards. Scientists are unsure whether female Komodo dragons have always had this latent ability to reproduce or if this is a new evolutionary development.

At 8 years old, Flora - whom Buley describes as "demure" - is sexually mature. Having been raised in captivity, she has never been exposed to a male Komodo dragon.

Flora's keepers first became suspicious in May, when she laid 25 eggs.

Though it's not uncommon for female dragons to lay eggs without mating, such eggs are not usually fertilized. As a precaution, they were placed in an incubator. About half of Flora's eggs looked like real eggs - they were very white and had solid shells.

When three of them collapsed, scientists took a closer look.

"We saw blood vessels and a small embryo," said Buley, "And we knew immediately that Flora had fertilized the eggs herself."

They then sent the collapsed eggs, along with tissue samples from Flora and a male Komodo dragon to a laboratory that conducted genetic testing to determine the eggs' parentage. Results showed that although the baby Komodo dragons are not exact Flora clones, their DNA could not have come from any other dragon.

"Komodo dragons seem to be able to switch ways of reproducing to deal with a shortage of suitable boyfriends,". In contrast, other lizard species that reproduce asexually cannot mate normally.

That might give Komodos a distinct survival edge. Only about 4,000 dragons remain in the wild, of which 1,000 are female.

"If female dragons can on occasion help out by virgin births, more power to them. Komodo dragons are the ultimate survivors. This is just another way this species can adapt to its surroundings."

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- O.K. Nessie, I guess it's about time for another evolutionary upheaval.

And the human race thinks it's so invulnerable.

"Jurrasic Park" anyone?