In the Dr. Seuss book “The Cat in the Hat”, we were introduced to a pair of troublemakers, Thing 1 and Thing 2. These two quirky characters would take the bull by the horns and all-out mayhem would ensue.
The same metaphor could be applied to my life. Before, there was Scott 1. Now, there’s Scott 2. The major difference is that Thing 1 and Thing 2 were identical twins, Scott 1 and Scott 2 are polar opposites...
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Scott 1 could take the bull by the horns.
Scott 2 can’t find a bull.
Scott 1 had a career and a life most people would envy. He knew just what, and where, to try next.
Scott 2 is standing on a road that forks in several hundred directions…none of them very promising.
Scott 1 knew just what he wanted, and most of the time, he went out and got it.
Scott 2 isn’t even sure what to eat for breakfast.
Scott 1 had a memory like a steel trap.
Scott 2 has a memory like a steel colander.
Scott 1 was surrounded by friends and lovers who cheered his successes and saw him through the rough patches.
Scott 2 is standing alone in the barren wasteland of his own mind.
Scott 1 felt strong, almost invincible at times.
Scott 2 has a hard time just getting out of bed most days.
Scott 1 could solve the most complex puzzle with ease.
Scott 2 gets puzzled trying to remember where he left his keys.
Scott 1 knew his place in the world.
Scott 2 does not.
Scott 1 was half-full.
Scott 2 is half-empty...
Sunday, February 08, 2009
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Inauguration Day
There’s a new man in town.
One who can take this whole mess and mold it into something new and exciting.
Like a bright, shiny, freshly minted penny.
He is surrounded by knowledgeable advisors who can help him to lead things in a new direction.
He has beaten the odds.
He has strength, tempered with a wisdom beyond his years.
He has looked into the face of adversity and stood his ground.
His future is bright, full of hope and promise.
And though I’m thankful for his arrival, I’m not necessarily talking about Barack Obama.
One who can take this whole mess and mold it into something new and exciting.
Like a bright, shiny, freshly minted penny.
He is surrounded by knowledgeable advisors who can help him to lead things in a new direction.
He has beaten the odds.
He has strength, tempered with a wisdom beyond his years.
He has looked into the face of adversity and stood his ground.
His future is bright, full of hope and promise.
And though I’m thankful for his arrival, I’m not necessarily talking about Barack Obama.
Friday, January 16, 2009
"RRRIIINNNG!...RRRIIINNNG!..."
It's 8:15 AM.
My phone is ringing.
Why is it ringing?
Then I remember...A couple of days ago I filled out an online application to a local temp agency and I have an appointment at 3:00 today. Too late! It's gone to voicemail. So I, of course, check my voicemail.
A 19 year-old female voice greets me. This is word-for-word what she said...
“Hi Scott. This is Britney calling from "fill-in-the-blank". I’m calling in regards to your appointment that you have with us today at 3:00. Unfortunately, we’re not going to be the best resource for you. You need to have at least 18 months to 2 years of recent office or clerical experience aaaaaaannnnnd I see from your application you don’t have that. If you have any questions, please feel free to give us a call back. Thank you.”
Yeah, right.
You interviewed my step-father. He's a 60 year-old man who's done nothing in his life but repair telephone lines and sell light bulbs in a hardware store. He types with his index finger.
Let me call you back right now, so you, like so many others, can tell me that I'm not needed.
No thanks.
My phone is ringing.
Why is it ringing?
Then I remember...A couple of days ago I filled out an online application to a local temp agency and I have an appointment at 3:00 today. Too late! It's gone to voicemail. So I, of course, check my voicemail.
A 19 year-old female voice greets me. This is word-for-word what she said...
“Hi Scott. This is Britney calling from "fill-in-the-blank". I’m calling in regards to your appointment that you have with us today at 3:00. Unfortunately, we’re not going to be the best resource for you. You need to have at least 18 months to 2 years of recent office or clerical experience aaaaaaannnnnd I see from your application you don’t have that. If you have any questions, please feel free to give us a call back. Thank you.”
Yeah, right.
You interviewed my step-father. He's a 60 year-old man who's done nothing in his life but repair telephone lines and sell light bulbs in a hardware store. He types with his index finger.
Let me call you back right now, so you, like so many others, can tell me that I'm not needed.
No thanks.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
A letter for the year 2008
Dear 2008,
Fuck You.
No...SERIOUSLY...
FUCK YOU!!!
You took my love.
You took my job.
You took my self-esteem.
You took my sanity.
You stabbed me through the heart.
You took my health.
You put me in the hospital.
You kicked me when I was down.
You gave me nothing to live for.
You damn near killed me.
I have been through some bad years in my life, but you my friend, take the whole FUCKING enchilada.
If it had been within my power, I would have kicked your sorry ass to the curb long ago.
You took.
And you took.
Then you took some more.
And when I didn't have anything left to take, you left me bleeding and unconscious, lying among the pile of crumbled pieces of what used to be called my life.
In numerology, on a scale from 1 to 9, you literally rank 1.
Personally, I give you -23.
No wait...that's still too high.
I have had enough of your presence.
Go away.
I hope you get fucked up the ass with a red-hot poker on your way out.
I will not miss any part of you.
Not one single moment.
It was only 2 days into your existence that you let me know your true intentions, you miserable fuck.
You haven't improved since.
You will not be missed, you fucking bastard.
_________________________________
Welcome, 2009.
I greet you with an open mind, an open heart and open arms...
Sunday, April 13, 2008
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