The Way I See It #4

The "no photo" issue:

- Ever notice that most of the girls who wear those tiny, hip hugger pants and crop t-shirts are WAY too overweight to pull it off? Who wants to see your rolls hanging out over the top of your jeans? You look like a sausage. What is it about fat chicks that makes them think they're soooo hot and their sh*t don't stink?

- Once and for all people, it's called "karaoke", not "rap-aoke". If all your going to do is speak the words to a song (and badly), get off the stage.

- What is the deal with those spam e-mails you get that end with a string of words like: bountiful adventure gleaming comprehend doorknob silence?

- The English language is completely screwed up. We have exceptions to every rule and exceptions to those exceptions. "I before E except after C"...so how do you explain "foreign"? I have a personal pet peeve, say the following words out loud:

Fuses

Fusses

Buses

Wait a minute, why isn't that busses? How anyone learns to speak this crazy language astounds me.

- And finally, I was out walking the other day (without my camera), and sitting at a stop light was a taxi cab with an ad for "Jubilee" on the roof. It's a photo of a half-naked girl in a g-string covered in jewels. Then I notice the truck right behind it...and on the side of the truck in bright red letters all it says is "Schwing".

The Way I See It #3

Well, that's certainly the largest vibrator I've ever seen...

The Way I See It #2

No caption needed...

A personal message

There's a part of me that is very sad. Sad because someone who has been a part of my life for over 17 years is missing, and I don't know how to talk to them. Conversations have been limited in the past few years (by an outside source), but now they are non-existent. I recently celebrated a birthday, and this is the first year I can remember that I didn't get a "Happy Birthday" phone call. Worst of all, this person hasn't disappeared voluntarily. You know who you are...

I know that you are going through a tough time right now, but disconnecting yourself from the rest of the world is not going to help the matter. Especially if that seclusion is forced upon you by another person. I know you've got inner turmoil and a lot of mixed emotions right now, and as a friend I am worried about your mental state. I know that some people have a reason to be angry, in their place I might feel the same way, but shutting down and refusing any help or support is not a wise decision. I have known you for far too long to let you go through this alone. I'd like to hear how you're coping with this. I'd like to hear anything. I have no idea what I have to do with this, but if someone has a problem with me talking to you, they can call me themselves.

The Playoffs

Will someone please explain to me why sports fans are so obsessed with baseball statistics? Do we really care or need to know? What is an RBI anyway? It stands for "runs batted in". But the only way a player can get a "run batted in" is if the guy up to bat before him was good enough to get on base and can run fast. So why does HE get a better rating?

The Way I See It - 1st Edition

It seems everyone has some sort of recurring theme on their blog, "About Me" lists, quizzes, or "The Nine". Well, I believe I've finally come up with one that's more suited to me. I'm not much of a writer, but I do feel that I notice things around me from a unique perspective. Ordinary things, often humorous, that most people would just pass by and not even notice. Things that could only be expressed in a picture. As they say, it's worth a thousand words. So I bring you "The Way I See It". Feel free to add a caption of your own, it's more fun when it's interactive...




Well, what else would you do after Happy Hour?

Top 10 things that should never be said by a white guy

(10) Gittin' jiggy widdit (why this ever came into being I will never know)

(9) The shizzle-frazizzle (what the ???)

(8) What up? (is it really so hard to add an "s"?)

(7) You da bomb (not such a good thing to be after 9/11)

(6) My bitch (okay, sexist AND derogitory, no wonder she left you)

(5) Crunk Juice (there are no circumstances where anyone needs to say this)

(4) You go girl (either you're a black woman or you're gay)

(3) Bling-bling (I know, it's too hard to pronounce "jewelry")

(2) Fly (even Snoop Puppy Rapist sounds dumb saying this one)

(1) Where you at? (can you believe this is actually an advertising slogan?)

And why not? Because you'll never hear a black guy stupid enough to say:

- Git 'er done!

October 3rd

It's October 3rd. In 2 days it will once again be that day that comes but once a year...my birthday. Granted, I'm not really feeling old...yet. I'll be 38. Nothing special, but you're definetly not young anymore. Your laugh lines a bit more pronounced, and those "fine lines" around your eyes aren't so fine anymore. Some mornings it's a bit harder to get going. You notice your skin in general is just not as "elastic" as it once was and it's starting to sag a bit. Maybe even a few of those weird brown spots start to show up out of nowhere. You find yourself actually looking at the "anti-aging" and "nightly renewal" creams at Walgreen's. And you notice hair growing from all sorts of places hair should never be growing from. But you don't really feel old, you're just starting to look it. 38. What is that anyway? It's in-between nothing. You're not "30-ish" or even "almost 40". I guess most of your 30's are spent just creeping up to 40, but the closer you get, the more dull it becomes...